Wednesday, September 23, 2009

A Soldier's last cry-Mumbai 26/11

Huddled inside, feeling for a fellow human
I sat there distraught, steel in my hand, fire in my belly
I could see him moving in front of me, like an apparition
My finger had the power to make him meet his doom

A relaxed quite evening, munching on morsels , lazing on CNN
A nice dull listless newscast turned horrific, I sat up
Hotel,blasts,terrorists,fishing boat, Skoda, CT,all in a blur
And then it happened, the ringer of my future beeped briefly

Twenty four hours have passed, sitting inside my luxury suite
Surrounded by the richness of blood,gore,death and anguish
I went back to the day I decided to serve my nation
A bride in my life , a sniper as her wedding gift

White shirts, candles, peace marches and email chains
Supporting a cause, emotionally charged for those special moments
It’s all very fine, neither seen by the militant nor the minister
Diplomacy never shared my workspace

Orders coming strong, the Major says kill all
Politics coming strong, capture him alive
I will die for my country, for my unit ,for my honor
But the country is long dead,so what am I fighting for?

We were taken hostage on our independence day
What the white soldiers left behind , the Netas took over
Bombay is just a microcosm of our times
But my duty eggs me to save our land again

The final assault, we move into position
Sandeep,Hemant and a few friends have left
Yes I’m a soldier, guts, nerves and an unnerving faith
But my heart bleeds, for I am human too

Yes, we are going to kill them, save hundreds of people
Awards, glory, promotions and for some , martyrdom
But where are we headed, dear countrymen?
Back into the abyss of corruption and greed

Maybe I should have taken the IT route, yes I am an engineer too,
Maybe America and dollars , and yes , a Skoda and a house
Maybe I could have watched this all in my home on TV
And forget about it when Sachin scores a century

The time has come , no more reflecting
Time for action, I move out, aiming to maim
Have a hostage in front and the scum next to her
I had to take a chance, now or never

I wait for his move, a slip, a chance
Her life cannot be harmed, I know mine can
I used the decoy, saw his movement
Grabbed her with one arm, shot him with the other

My sub machine gun remained silent
As if a witness to the grim ordeal of my fate
I saved a life, I knew, and it wasn’t mine
The defence deal had sealed my life

I caught him by his leg , refusing to let go till I live
Slipping into comatose,eveything whirring past my mind
My home, my folks ,my school, those memories
our garden, my dreams, my childhood….the politics

Maybe we have corrupt ministers, no hopers in charge
Maybe our laws are outdated and we are mired in survival
But this I leave you with...It’s an honor to be born in the soil of my land
Let us fight till the end,Don't lose hope, we are Indians, be proud

Monday, September 21, 2009

Chak De India, 63 not out

Independence, the very word makes the air around me light
Sixty three years of solitude, struggle and days of cheer
Where are we? , where is the world?, are we ready?
Questions and thoughts, reverberate among the billion

Traumatic divisions, heart rending cries
Triumphant sounds of freedom at midnight
Bold faced youth and their dreams held high
A saint and an idealist , the pillars of our land

Do we believe in this concept called India?
Do we stand for our rights or do we denigrate our duties?
How much of our India, do you and I know?
Do the corridors of dollarland define our path?

I stand up for the anthem , but not for my country
I stand up for my cause, but not for my people
I love my country, as long as I am paid
Patriotism, have we buried your meaning?

The beggar wake up, from the footpaths of poverty
The ruler wakes up, not sure of his place in posterity
The family wakes up, dreaming of the child
The child wakes up, India is my playground

We did cross the barrier, the world sees my country
Did we cross that barrier for you and I to see?
Where is that feeling of my land, our home?
Good morning India, you may now rise

Saturday, September 19, 2009

The migraine of being myself


The sad truth about cross eyed paths
Is the pain one pays when reason stops
We walk through blood as we see not red
But stop and cry at things we said

Down and out we feel some days
Angered thoughts and a tearful face
Sadness rides this mournful phase
The dance of gloom in many ways

Calmness ran on thorny roads
Gasping for a breath of sense
Why we fought ,this no one knows
Sorrow made its grand entrance

When dusk settles on lonely friends
We hope that memories of moments
Will tear that pall of hopelessness
and friendship glows in happiness

Saturday, September 12, 2009

She was...

Desolation, the only gift left behind by death
She never will show her auburn face
again, she lives no more , her final breath
went passing by, my life stood still , just thoughts ablaze

A lifetime back I held her hand , or did she mine?
The tender touch of newborn love pervades as
she smiled away my pains ,I called her valentine
as though the saint will cure mortality, only Love does

As dreams went on and days went by
I grew ,she grew and so did that wretched thorn
in her , which no balm of man can cure or try
what to try , what is left , just tears and dust and memories forlorn

The song of true love


I bless the day I found you
when sunshine kissed my heart
Please let me be around you
Till death do us part

I hum the tune of true love
In ever-lasting song
one day i'll come to you love
And take our dreams along

I send you all my longing
For you and me in life
If you were my be-longing
I'll call us man and wife

Friday, September 4, 2009

Dramaturgy



Suddenly the pangs of grief engulf my being
Struck with the absolute called Death closing in
This useless shell covering my soul, starts withering
The time has come, the dark angel beckons me

Waking up with a spring in my step
With a soul brimmed with joy and warmth
I spring to life and run with the wind
I croon along with the melody of life

The old woman, the wretch that I am
Hunchbacked with horror, wickedness defined
I look at this pitiful world, a cackle escapes my cavities
I shriek and scream with sadistic delight

To be or not to be, that is my answer
The young prince of indecision, I am but mad
Born to my father, a prisoner of fate
I twist and turn my mind's demons

Who am I, what is he that wears so many masks?
Am I the sum or the whole of many parts
Now that I am I, let me share my secret
Oh! To be an actor, to walk and run and die on stage!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Once upon a life

She left last morning, moist eyes and a heavy heart
the skies opened up, as if the whole of my life was crying
She said goodbye , she said farewell, she said things I fear most
Her voice was trembling, my soul died that very minute

As I walk through the moaning walls of this town
as if the ghost within me had died once again
The loveliness of that beautiful visage , of that woman who was mine
comes near me , she reaches out ,as we walk hand in hand into paradise
As I open my eyes, she is gone, my hand goes limp, my life stands still

What were the last words she said to me, my ears only heard the song on her lips
Did she say she's going , or did she say she is leaving
Where does this quandary leave me now? when will my heart stop wanting her
I left her yesterday for the first time, I said hello, she said goodbye